My wife has a blog and you should read what she has to say. Seeing that she is smarter than me and pretty much maximum awesome you should read her. check it out here or here is the url…
http://www.aubreyshelsta.blogspot.com
here is some food is a thought…
My Space = P.C.
Facebook = Mac
(i know that “P.C” stands for personal computer but you get what i mean)…
What do you think… are you a myspace person or a facebook person??? the battle line is drawn!! and if you don’t care… good… it is probably better not to care
Most of my morning has been comprised of listening to elton john and playing guitar. The song that “hit me deep” was mona lisas and mad hatters. it is just able to capture a feeling of frustrations with society and the meaningfulness of personal relationships. I have been missing many of my good friends and am tired of seeing, what seems to be the same picture on the cover of the New York Times… violence and violence forever. The song was both melancholy and hopeful at once. At my next show I think i will cover it.
I have probably watched “Say Anything” four or five times in the past month or two. Mainly because it strangely hits me on a very personal level and i am learning to take my cues from lloyd. No, i have not taken up kick boxing and no my father in-law isn’t involved in a tax scandal resulting in jail time, but the dynamics of lloyd and diane feels very identifiable right now. Aubrey is loving every second of what she is doing. She is in grad school learning new things, making an impact on peoples life and all around being a good contributing member of society. I on the other hand make lattes (which I guess has value in the good will hunting… “there is honor in that kind of work” says matt damon to ben afflec conversation). All this to say that this is not really where i pictured my self lets say 10 years ago … hell 3 years ago. I more so pictured my self a few years into working at a church finally getting some trust from students or making great music with people i love… not making lattes in the town I grew up. It just feels so typical. It feels so anti-climactic.
Amidst this “quarter-life crisis” I found that it is important for me to reposition my self and my idea of what my life “needs” to be. Right now I need to be lloyd dobbler to aubrey. I am her support. I hold her hand an tell her everything is going to be ok when the seat belt sign goes off. i do the dishes and clean the apartment, i rub her neck when she is tired of reading. It is vary different place for me the poster child for church oriented upward mobility.
I also find that I need the discipline of discontentment. For so long i have always been doing stuff that i am passionate about or what was best for a “career” in church, but now i am barley involved in a church accept the absurd amount of theology and church related blogs that i read. I have totally unplugged from church as employment. We now are going to a church here in boulder called roots but we are “guests” we are not in leadership in anyway we just show up, go to cell group and try to love the people around us. It is a very different way to experience church life. It is strange because I still think about how to “do” church or what is the christian life, but with no real sway over how people practice that. I just think about it and that is that. life seems to be in limbo and i want to be ok with the limbo and the continued limbo with out an end but there is an end and i am a little afraid of what will happen at the end of that time. I guess right now life feels like a very strange desert where i know that there is an oasis in the distance but i wish that i didn’t know… it would make the desert so much more bearable.
So in this time of waiting… i watch “say anything” for cues on how to be a good lloyd dobbler… how to be in a posture of support for my very lovely and beautiful wife…. my diane court.
Look what i found … http://www.dailycamera.com/news/2007/jun/24/city-wheels-in-bike-map-site/ random… i didn’t buy the bike… but i am still looking for a road bike… so if you have one you want to get me… let me know.
I came across this article on my netvibes feeds the other. The article says “among men ages 20-29, 73% said they had never been married in 2006, compared with 64% in 2000. For women, 62.2% had never married in 2006, compared with 53.4% six years earlier.”
On a whole i am not surprised accept at one of the reason speculated reasons for this across the board shift mentioned early in the article. They say that men and women are having a harder time becoming independent and thus delay marriage. That seems ass backwards to me. You are going to be totally independent and then suddenly become dependent? How is a marriage a union between two people (one flesh) make more sense if you are more “independent” (what the hell does independent mean anyway?) But i guess in a society governed by autonomy this is “logical.”
I brought this study up at work the other day and an interesting conversation ensued, and this is most notably because all four of the people that were working were under the age of thirty and 3 of us were married. It brought up questions of gender roles and identity (one of the reasons for non-marriage was women had more options and were less confined to the role of “wife”), and the idea of “equality.”
Much of my thinking lately has been exploring the idea of “story” as it pertains to particular identity. I was reading an interesting article over on the church and postmodern culture: conversation blog and it really made me think about our gender performance, and an ability to perform our gender (socialized or not). It also got me thinking about how if any “progress” with gender roles is going to made it can not be constituted by forgetfulness. As a male i need to remember the privilege i inherited, in order to be humble in renouncing that privilege (especially in my marriage). In modern society the idea of equality normally means forgetting your story and the events that constituted life previously. For example, slaves were suddenly not slaves anymore, thus neglecting the story that had constituted their life previously. It was simply forgetting that made things ok (see hauerwas article: Why Time Cannot and Should Not Heal the Wounds).
On a completely unrelated note, I am reading a An Ethic for Christians and Other Aliens in a Strange Land by William Stringfellow that my friend Kyle gave me. It is a very challenging read (not in that it is difficult to comprehend but rather the comprehension is challenging) and i suggest that you pick it up and let me know what you think.
Also let me know if you like the new blog… or if i have totally lost you.
I am still trying to figure out how the lay out in these postings work… and as i am finding out, and as you can see, very strangely. So i will just put the pics at the end. I climbed for about an hour awhile on a few of the routes that i could make out. I found out that i am really bad, and have no idea what i am doing, but i still love it. I had a great time. It was beautiful and my feet look like raisins after. If you would like to go climbing with me some time let me know… it is fun.
Yes that is what I did today… I went bouldering. I hadn’t been for awhile and since my brother left me his crash pad (a pad that break your fall from short falling heights), I can pretty much go when ever i want. There is a pretty good set of rocks formations about a mile from my house. So, I packed on the pad, leashed up my dog, filled the nalgene, and walked out my door door to go bouldering (I LOVE IT!!!). here are some pictures and I will narrate them as i go.
after walking through some houses and a park you come to this tunnel and it puts onto a trail and that you walk up to some red rock formations.
and if you are lucky you might see my dog take a crap
walk up this trail and you see this formation in front of you
i will post more later but now back to work….
For the first three months aubs and I moved to boulder my neighbors and I have been stealing internet from the college students that lived in the apartment complex next door… but when they move out we fell into an internet black hole rendering us dependent on internet cafes and coffee shops. But alas we have sprung for internet and split with our neighbors the Zenz’s… and the blog is back on line.
our .mac membership expired as well and all and all i didn’t like it all that much so i am back over on my typepad account… which i had no qualms with… so here we go cellar pt 3… let the blog nerdom begin!!!
